Match Preview: Aston Villa v Liverpool

Who are we playing?
Liverpool on Saturday 17th January at 3pm

Where are we playing?
Villa Park

Can I go?
Tickets remain available but (amazingly given the circumstances) they are selling fast, so get in quick if you want your favourite spot.

Easy to get to?
Yep, but if you are going through town, be aware that they buggering up all the roads near Paradise Circle as they knock down the old library.

Can I watch it on telly?
Saturday 3 o'clocker, so not officially available on UK telly, though there are plenty of web streams and loads of pubs will screen the game live.

Big game?
Huge.

Liverpool are by no means the force they were last season, with some of Southampton contingent struggling to settle in. They have undoubtedly missed the services of the departed Suarez and and the injured Sturridge, while the imminent departure of long serving captain Steve "Don't try to change the CD" Gerrard is casting a long shadow.

Indeed, arguably Villa's best performance of the season was up at Anfield where we deservedly took all three points as Gabby effectively nullified the threat of Stevie G from the game.

If only Mister Agbonlahor had been any where near as useful in any game since.

No point calling this a must-win game because you have to score goals to win matches and we don't know how any more.

There's zero point in having the lion's share of the ball if you haven't got a Scooby what to do with it and Villa's lack of (useful) movement is becoming a chronic condition.

Do Liverpool have any famous fans? 
A big hello to Jason Isaacs! There's also Ian Beale off of EastEnders and controversial pop star Lana del Rey

We've got fiddle playing scruffbox Nigel Kennedy.

So we win.

Who's playing for us?
Who knows. We might even buy someone by Saturday. Defence could be an issue. Vlaar and Senderos are long term absentees and Clark has got himself suspended so it looks like fragile Nathan Baker will be pitched in. Gawd knows what we'll do if he makes his characteristic early exit.

Who's playing for them?
If you believe the rumours, quite possibly Fabian Delph. Honestly believe the current regime at Villa would be daft enough to allow that to happen. At least it might liven up the atmosphere.

Any useless stats?
Of course, here you go:

• Liverpool have beaten us 91 times while we have 56 wins. There have been 40 draws.

• Our last Villa Park win over Liverpool was back in May 2011. Stewart Downing got the only goal. 

• Villa's best performance against the Merseyside club was on 15 December 1976 when we demolished them 5-1.

Prediction
Going for a 2-0 Liverpool win.

Match Report: Leicester City 1-0 Villa as it was tweeted

Gary Gardner buggers off to Forest

Struggling Nottingham Forest have completed the signing of Aston Villa midfielder Gary Gardner on loan until the end of the season.

The 22-year-old, who won five England Under 21s caps under Psycho Stuart Pearce, scored twice as he spent the first half of the season at Brighton.

He has made a smattering of Premier League appearances for Villa and will be eligible for selection against Sheffield Wednesday, where he had a very brief loan spell last season.

Match Report: Villa 1-0 Blackpool as it was tweeted

Match Preview: Leicester City v Aston Villa

Who are we playing?
Leicester City on Saturday 10th January at 3pm

Where are we playing?
King Power Stadium Filbert Way, Leicester LE2 7FL

Can I go?
Allocation: 3,335 Tickets Sold Out

Easy to get to?
Always found the train the best option. It's a fair yomp to the ground, but do-able. Policing can be a bit heavy handed though and if you're not careful you'll end up being kettled by Leicestershire's finest.

Can I watch it on telly?
Saturday 3 o'clocker so dodgy web streams and pubs with overseas satellite systems are your best bet.

Big game?
Huge.

Leicester's early doors promise quickly faded away and they find themselves propping up the rest, but they have been signs of late they are starting to play a bit again and were unlucky not to get a win at Anfield.

Villa meanwhile continue to be horrible to watch, content to pass the ball about while rarely venturing over the halfway line.

There is a bewildering lack of movement and creativity and Paul Lambert must be watching every game through rose tinted spectacles as his post match press conferences show just how deluded his really is.

It's absolutely vital that we take three points here because if we can't beat Leicester we are BANG in trouble.

Do Leicester have any famous fans?
Well there's ATV Sport's Gary Newbon of "Gary Newbon. What a wanker! What a wanker" fame, jug-earred goal hanger Gary Lineker and the bloke that played Greengrass in Heartbeat.

We've got heir to the throne the Duke of Cambridge.

So we win.

Who's playing for us?
The usual useless uninspiring and unspired suspects, but Lambert lacks the imagination to take a risk when what he's doing has taken all the joy out of watching Aston Villa.

Who's playing for them?
Ulloa has been in and out of the team of late, but we reckon he's found his scoring boots again and is a major danger.

Any useless stats?
Of course, here you go:

• Leicester City have beaten us 39 times while we have 32 wins. There have been 23 draws

• Our last win away at the then Walkers Stadium came in 2006 as we we ran out 3-2 winners in a League Cup tie. Gabby Agbonlahor scored the winner right at the end of extra time.

• Our last Premier League meeting at their place in 2004 saw us demolish them with five second half goals. Darius Vassell and Peter Crouch scored two each while Dion Dublin also found the net.

Prediction
Going for a 1-0 win for Leicester

FA Cup 3rd Round Preview: Aston Villa v Blackpool

Who are we playing?
Blackpool on Sunday 4th January at 3pm

Where are we playing?
Villa Park

Can I go?
Tickets are cheap and plentiful

Easy to get to?
Should be an absolute doddle, though the trains can be shite on Sundays

Can I watch it on telly?
Not on the list of games to be screened on UK telly and with the FA Cup, there is no guarantee that the game will be screened live overseas, no a live stream can't be guaranteed. Best bet is haul your arse down Villa Park and watch the game in the flesh.

Big game?
We last won the FA Cup in 1957 and we've precious little chance of winning it under Paul Lambert's hapless leadership.

This season's limp display from a weakened side as we slumped out to a second string Leyton Orient in the League Cup was not a one off. Lambert's cup record for Villa against "inferior" opposition is fucking woeful.

A poor Blackpool side are plumb bottom of the Championship and there can be NO EXCUSES if we lose to them.

Do the Tangerines have any famous fans? 

Nolans don't make waves...

Apparently not. It has been said that some of The Nolan Sisters are Blackpool fans, but we're not even sure they count as famous anymore...

We've got fiddle playing scruffbox Nigel Kennedy.

So we win.

Who's playing for us?
Gawd knows. Players returning from loan (unless we send them back out again) may give Paul Lambert more scope to rotate his squad, something injuries and suspensions have hampered of late.

We'd be hugely tempted to give both Callum Robinson and Jack Grealish a proper run out but who knows what goes on in Lambo's head.

He will claim whoever he plays was "excellent" even if we get knocked out, because the bloke is a knobhead.



Who's playing for them?
Dunno but they've got Nathan Delfouneso on their books and we'll be hoping the the magic of the cup doesn't transform him into a goal scorer.

Any useless stats?
Of course, here you go:

• Blackpool have beaten us 21 times while we have 28 wins. There have been 17 draws.

• Our previous FA Cup encounter with Blackpool was on 22 January 1938 in the fourth round. We won the match 4-0, Eric Houghton amongst the scorers.

• Blackpool haven't beaten us since a 2-1 win at their place in 1974. Chico Hamilton got our goal.

• James Collins got the last gasp winner the last time we beat Blackpool, a 3-2 victory in November 2010.

Prediction
Going for a 1-1 draw and an awkward replay to negotiate

Match Report Villa v Palace as it was tweeted....