Big Chris fucking off to Scouseland

Villa's talismanic striker and the source of nearly all its goals is set to bugger off and join Liverpool after the clubs reached agreement on a deal, thought to be worth £32.5 millon, after protracted negotiations.

Assuming Liverpool aren't gazumped and the last minute and Big Chris passes a stringent medical - Liverpool doctor Andy Massey has left the club's pre-season tour, flying from Adelaide to England - we will wave goodbye to the big Belgian in next 48 hours.

Full details of the deal are likely to be kept under wraps - usual procedure for Villa transfers, in or out, these days - but we do know that the Merseyside club was keen to pay on the drip, rather than giving all the dosh up front.

A slice of the fee will have to go to Genk, so it may not be the massive windfall that many are pinning their hopes on and Villa have already splashed large wodges of cash on Idrissa Gueye and Jordan Amavi, proving that the years of austerity that have seen us turn into perpetual relegation candidates may be drawing to a close.

We at villamad.co.uk wish Christian Benteke every success in the future (except when he's facing us), but are slightly disappointed that he chose to leave us for Liverpool and not a club where he'd have a tilt at winning a big trophy.