Match Preview: Newcastle v Aston Villa

I'm Free: Alan Pardew does his John Inman impression

Who are we playing?
Newcastle United

Where are we playing?
St James' Park, Sunday 1.30pm

Can I go?
Tickets on general sale at a very reasonable £27 a shot and free coach travel was available for people who got in early enough. The away section is really high up so take your binoculars and an oxygen tank if you're going.

Can I watch it live on the telly?
You certainly can if you (or your pub of choice) have the delights of Sky Sports who are screening the game as part of Super Sunday.

Big game?

Will the McMahons turn Newcastle upside down?

Massive!

Newcastle have really struggled of late. Unlikely as it sounds they've really been on the down slope since Joe Kinnear left, though it's highly unlikely that two things are related. Geordies tend to wear their hearts on their sleeves (as you'll know if saw them looking distraught on Witton Lane after we'd relegated them) and they booed Pardew's men off after the last home game.

If we can bomb at them early doors and pinch an early lead, the mood in the ground could work massively in our favour, so best to hope that we employ our Anfield tactics rather than those used by Lambert at Goodison.

Meanwhile, much fun has been had at the prospect of WWE bigwig Vince McMahon taking over the reins at St. James' Park.

Newcastle fan Donna Air

Do Newcastle United have any famous fans?
Well there's Lewis out of ITV's po-faced detective drama Lewis. There's also Donna Air, a woman credited with asking Irish pop group The Corrs how they met!

We've got fiddle playing scruff Nigel Kennedy.

So we win.

Who's playing for us?
Unless anyone picks up a pedalo injury or tweaks anything while playing golf out in Portugal, the squad should in theory be in the best place it's been in some time fitness-wise with only long term crocks Okore, Kozak and N'Zogbia out of contention, though we've absolutely no idea what the state of play with forgotten man Chris Herd is.

Key here will be whether Lambert continues to experiment with width, having been seemingly averse to it throughout his Villa tenure. Not sure how many starts Marc Albrighton can expect to make unless he can prove that he's not a one-trick pony.


Who's playing for them?
Some French players.

Any useless stats?
Of course, here you go:

• Villa's first meeting with Newcastle was on 16th February 1895 and we demolished them 7-1 to knock them out of the FA Cup. Charlie Athersmith, John Devey and William Dorrell all scored twice.

• The first meeting between the two clubs at St James' Park was on 1st October 1898; John Devey netted for Villa as we drew 1-1.

• Our last win over Newcastle was in April 2011 with James Collins grabbing the only goal. Only Gabby Agbonlahor remains from the players involved that day, though Clark and Albrighton were unused subs.

• Our last win at St James' Park was way back in 2005, Juan Pablo Angel put us ahead early doors and two late penalties from Gareth Barry gave us a 3-0 victory.

He said, She said...
'Any club that has a big fan base, especially at home they expect to win. When things are going against you then you can hear the grumblings. And sometimes, as a player, it can get to you. You have got to try to get their crowd against them.' Paul Lambert

“The performance against Spurs did not reflect this club and the side I pick to face Villa will reflect that.” Alan Pardew


Prediction
Going for a shock 3-0 Villa win if we get an early goal or a 2-0 Newcastle triumph if we don't.