Tuesday 7 January 2014

Match Preview: Aston Villa v Arsenal

More chance of bumping into two Princess Leias than Villa winning tonight
Who are we playing?
You can wash yer hands and face, you can wash yer... Arsenal

Where are we playing?
Villa Park, Monday 13th January at 8pm or thereabouts

Can I go?
You can go, tickets available but pricey despite the fact it's on telly and being played at a highly inconvenient time. Get in quick if you want your favourite spot, quite a lot of "amber areas" on the stadium map.

Easy to get to?
Easier to get home from because the roads will be lovely and quiet at ten on a Monday night.

Can I watch it live on the telly?
You can, but you'll have to put up with lashings of Gary Neville. Gary is a good pundit to be fair, which means he won't have many nice things to say about our inept, rudderless play. We're on Sky Sports Monday Night Football. If you've not got Sky Sports you can get a day pass from Now TV.

Big game?
Huge for Arsenal as they scrap it out for the league title. Not so much for us because most Villa fans have already resigned themselves to losing this one. In a way, this may actually help take some of the pressure off our beleaguered team who haven't managed to play well and win at the same time since we shocked Wenger's charges at the Emirates. We just have to hope that we don't get thrashed this time.

Dara Ó Briain and Dido
Do Arsenal have any famous fans?  
Hundreds of them. It seems to be obligatory to be an Arsenal fan if you find any sort of fame at all, shockingly.

Bearing in mind a lot of Arsenal's football over the last few decades has been as exciting as her albums, it's not a surprise to find out that Dido is a Gooner, as is geeky Irish funnyman Dara Ó Briain.

Word has it that Carry On stalwart and EastEnders matriarch, Babs "Gerrouddameyepub" Windsor is an Arsenal supporter, though we'd don't know of anyone that spotted her on Highbury's  North Bank. They've also got the Appletons out of All Saints.
One of the Appletons
We've got Mark Williams off The Fast Show

So we win.

Who's playing for us?
It would be really nice if we could make three significant signings in the next few days and they could take their Villa Park bows.

More likely that we'll just cobble together whoever is fit, especially in defence where are meagre resources are being stretched paper thin. Gabby should be back and Joe Bennett is finally training again but Concrete Ron and Nathan Baker are massive doubts.

Who's playing for them?
Walcott's injury is a massive blow, not only to Arsenal, but for England. Genuinely gutted for the lad, we wish him all the best from villamad.co.uk. Bentner's injury leaves them short up front, so they may have to get inventive if anything happens to Giroud.

Jack Wilshire reckons he'll recover from an ankle knock in time to be considered, while Alex Oxbowlake-Chamberpot could be back in contention for the first time since his injury against us in August.

Any useless stats?
Of course, here you go:
  • We played Woolwich Arsenal in October 1904, losing 1-0 at the Manor Ground, Plumstead to a William Henry Gooing goal. We didn't have to wait long for revenge though, running out 3-1 winners on Boxing Day at Villa Park with Harry Hampton amongst the scorers.
  • We won our first encounter after they dropped the "Woolwich" at Highbury in January 1920 thanks to a Clem Stephenson goal.
  • Olof Mellberg took the honour of scoring the first ever Premier League goal at the Emirates Stadium in August 2006 as Villa battled to a 1-1 draw.
  • Although we've beaten Arsenal at the Emirates three times since it opened, we haven't managed a victory over them at Villa Park this century, our last win coming in the pre-Christmas encounter in 1998
He said, She said...
"The team is excellent and we have to try to compete with them. We did it once and we have to try to do it again. If you let them settle and let them play, then they can hurt you." - Paul Lambert

"It is unbelievable because he played the first game of the season, against Aston Villa, and now he is back and available and it is against Aston Villa again. That makes it five months where has been completely out, so that means he is fresh and that should give us a boost."  - Arsene Wenger on Oxbowlake-Chamberpot

Prediction
Fearing the worst here, predicting a 3-1 Arsenal victory

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