Another Villa PR disaster as "wavering" Vassos gets free shirt

Match Report: U21s Man City 2 Villa 0 as it was tweeted

Match Preview: Aston Villa v Hull City

Who are we playing?
Hull City

Where are we playing?
Villa Park, 3pm Saturday

Can I go?
You can go, but be prepared for a toxic atmosphere.

Can I watch it live on the telly?
Not legally in the UK no, however there are plenty of pubs with dodgy dishes and dubious web streams if you've not got a ticket but are desperate to watch as it happens but don't want the players to hear your boos.

Famous Hull fans Omar and Tom

Big game?
MASSIVE.

Shane Long did us a massive favour by nabbing a late equaliser for Hull away at Fulham. He won't be looking to do us any favours this time though.

On current form, we can't remember a worse time. Just a single point out of a possible eighteen in the last six and to be perfectly honest, we were lucky to get that. This had already been the worst ever season in Villa Park's history before that disastrous run.

We go into this game devoid of hope and merely praying that other teams slip up to save our Premier League status. Lose this one and people will stop asking for Paul Lambert to be sacked and demand a public stoning.

We've seen a few right tits at Villa Park this season

Do Hull City have any famous fans?
Well, there's Omar Sharif, who was apparently introduced to the delights of The Tigers by Tom Courtney while making the epic film Doctor Zhivago.

There's also Simon Cowell hanger-on and erstwhile pop princess Sinitta, though she also follows Chelsea, but apparently eighties popstars are allowed to have two teams.

We've got Vassos Alexander off the Chris Evans Breakfast Show. He was "wavering" but the club's lovely PR department have bribed him with a free shirt and we've still got him.

So we win.

Who's playing for us?
Surely our gormless apology of a manager can't keep starting the formless Andi Weimann. With Albrighton capable of carpet bombing the area with crosses, don't groan but we'd start Grant Holt. He can always be hauled off after an hour if his batteries run out.

Gabby still looks out of sorts but the fact that he nabbed a goal in Wales will probably secure his spot. Fabian Delph looks like he's already on his holidays, such was his lack of contribution at the Liberty. We'd be tempted to drop him to the bench as a kick up the backside.

Paul Lambert can't fault the effort of the players. We reckon they got his prescription wrong when he picked up his new glasses. Should have gone to Specsavers.


Who's playing for them?
Deadly loan duo Jelavic and Long were back on song at Craven Cottage and will likely terrorise our disorganised back line. Curtis Davies has developed into a decent defender since his Villa Park days, certainly miles better than anyone we've got.

Tom Huddlestone can be brilliant one week and dire the next. With an FA Cup Final just two weeks away, Hull players will be keen to avoid injury, so a few clattering tackles should get them on the back foot. We need to go in hard and ugly.


Any useless stats?
Of course, here you go:

• We have 16 wins over Hull while they've managed to beat us on only 5 occasions. There have been 7 draws.

• Hull City have only ever managed one win over us at Villa Park. That shock win came on 18th November 1967. Brian Greenhalgh nabbed two for Villa but we still went down 2-3.

• Villa's biggest win over Hull was a 6-0 thumping on a Wednesday night in August 1974. Sammy Morgan got a hat trick. Sammy's goals caused Villa to part with £10,000 to Port Vale as the transfer deal called this once he reached ten goals.

• Hull City last beat Aston Villa at the old Boothferry Park ground on 29th August 1987. The score was 2-1, Warren Aspinall getting Villa's goal from the penalty spot.

Steve Bruce

He said, She said...
“The frustrating thing is we’ve beaten some of the good sides, most recently Chelsea, but we’ve lost against some of the teams near the bottom of the league" David Cameron

"If we finish where we are or a place higher, it pays for a Jelavic or a Long. We're in 13th, and we budgeted to finish 20th. It is about a million quid a place so all of those things are huge to a club like ours." Steve Bruce


Prediction

If Paul Lambert is still in place by the time we kick off on Saturday, there will be precious little goodwill inside Villa Park. This is the last chance for the majority of the support to get behind the team this season but the last chance to demonstrate displeasure too. Hull City can now play without fear, our lot will be bloody petrified. Predicting a Hull City win and the worst day at Villa Park since losing to Sheffield Wednesday 1-2 on 4th May 1987.

VIDEO: Paul Lambert talks bollocks after Swansea

Match Report: Swansea 4 Villa 1 as it was tweeted...

Football's (maybe) Coming Home

Platini

Uefa has announced that the finals of Euro 2020 will be held in either London or Munich, with the competing cities being kept on tenterhooks until 19 September.

Both The FA and their German counterparts have submitted bid dossiers for the semi-finals/final package at the tournament, which will be staged in 13 cities across Europe.

"We are extremely happy to have received so many bids to host Euro 2020," smarmed the Uefa president Michel Platini. "The 60th year anniversary edition of the tournament will be an historic one, with matches played in many European countries.

"By spreading [Euro 2020] across our continent, we will allow more fans from more nations to share in the excitement of hosting such a magical event. Member associations will also benefit greatly from this format, since more of them will be exposed to an elite tournament and have the opportunity to increase the development of football in their respective countries. I wish all the candidates the best of luck in this bidding process."

Uefa also revealed the19 member associations and cities which have also submitted bids for the 'standard package', which entails hosting three group matches and one knockout round game in either the last 16 or quarter-finals, 12 of these will be successful. They are:

Azerbaijan/Baku, Belarus/Minsk, Belgium/Brussels, Bulgaria/Sofia, Denmark/Copenhagen, England/London, Macedonia/Skopje, Germany/Munich, Hungary/Budapest, Israel/Jerusalem, Italy/Rome, Holland/Amsterdam, Republic of Ireland/Dublin, Romania/Bucharest, Russia/Saint Petersburg, Scotland/Glasgow, Spain/Bilbao, Sweden/Stockholm, Wales/Cardiff.

Return of the Invisible Men: Randy makes furtive visit to Villa

After reports that Randy Lerner's private jet had flown into Birmingham International Airport on Tuesday, Paul Lambert confirmed at his regular Thursday Press Conference that the chairman and owner of the club had indeed made a flying visit earlier in the week.

Lerner is said to have had a five minute chat with Lambert and also took a few minutes out of his busy schedule to address the players and coaching staff.

"From day one Randy's been 100 per cent with me but football owes you nothing and we must respect his decision when it comes" Paul Lambert


Meanwhile agent Mads Bach Lund has confirmed on Twitter that forgotten man Nicklas Helenius is fit and ready for action...

@NicklasHelenius is fully fit and ready to play if the team needs him. He has Worked hard, gained some pounds and is 100% focused #beast #9
— Mads Bach Lund (@MadsBachLundSEG) April 24, 2014

Sylla first in the queue for Villa exodus?

Just over a week after Paul Faulkner called for unity and subsequently two of Paul Lambert's long term lieutenants were suspended by the club, more evidence of a  lack of unity in the club has emerged as Yacouba Sylla is quoted in the press as wanting to get a loan deal and move away from Aston Villa.

The quotes reveal the Mali midfielder's frustration at his lack of game time this season, having been a key player in the Villa revival that secured our Premier League status at the end of last term's campaign.

With Charles N'Zogbia using social media to suggest that he is being forced to train with the kids in recent weeks, Sylla's outburst is evidence that all is still not harmonious at Bodymoor Heath as Villa head into four difficult games, three of them away from home with only the tricky fixture against Hull City at Villa Park with our Premier League status still not mathematically assured.

“There are a lot of teams I could contribute to. I think I will leave on loan at the end of the season. I could already have done so in December but the gaffer told me that he was counting on me.

“What I want, is to come back to France, on loan for one year to a good club, a team with a good project.

“My agent Moussa Sissoko is working for that and there are interested clubs.

“Again, the most important thing for me is to play. I am no longer the same man, not the same player. I cannot wait to change all that again.

“I am always on the bench and never on the pitch.

“Even if I do get to visit some wonderful stadiums and that life here is different than in France, I am not happy because I am not playing.

“My situation is not as dramatic as I have just made it sound but for somebody who loves football and does not get to play, I cannot be happy because I am not expressing myself on the pitch every weekend.

“It encourages me to keep hope. I am working hard in training. Last season, I contributed to keeping the club from relegation. This season it is more complicated.

“There have been decisions that I did not understand and I have not got the game time I had hoped for.”

Sylla isn't the only player to have received less game time than he might have expected. 

Matt Lowton has constantly been dropped then reselected despite playing all but one of Villa's games last season, while Bulgarian international Aleksander Tonev has never been given an extended run in the starting line-up. Antonio Luna has vanished from the matchday squad since Ryan Bertrand arrived on loan and Nicklas Helenius has become virtually invisible despite the fact the both Christian Beneteke and Libor Kozak have long term injuries.

Add to this bomb squad members like Darren Bent, Alan Hutton and Enda Stevens who'll be returning from loan deals in May, players like Albrighton approaching the end of their contracts and youth players who may not get professional deals and they'll be such  a queue of cars so anxious to drive out of Bodymoor Heath that we may even get a mention from Sally Traffic.

Whatever Lambert's fate or the outcome of any takeover, it's likely that will a significant turnover of playing staff in the summer.

@TheUltimateWard @villamadtweets Sylla & Tonev are no loss though. What is a loss is losing players when we have an infamously small squad.

— Sam (@BeardedMunners) April 23, 2014

@villamadtweets thankfully Sylla is awful

— BARRY ROBERTSON (@baz_robertson) April 23, 2014

Plan to mark 20 years since the old Holte End closed

Randy Lerner speaks AGAIN!!!!!

We still think he's inside the lion...

Twice in week? Like buses nothing for ages then two come at once...

Villa's owner and chairman has issued another statement following speculation about his selling up. Tellingly, the statement is NOT a denial that he's looking to sell.

"Following the point yesterday at Villa Park, there have been stories about my selling the Club. On a personal level, I had hoped the emphasis would have been on the amazing effort on the part of our manager and our players to regroup throughout a very difficult week. 

"Injuries to Libor and Christian, compounded with the early loss of Jores and the difficult rehab of Charles have no doubt left Paul with far less to work with than is fair. Still, Paul Lambert has done nothing but work within the parameters I've set, put the Club first and continue to trust his players. 

"As regards my personal role at the Club and the steady rumours of a sale, I will address these after the season. 

"Paul Lambert, Paul Faulkner and I speak daily and remain committed to the immediate job of limiting distraction and confusion in order that Villa have the best chance possible of finishing on a strong note."

- Randy Lerner, Aston Villa Chairman

Match Preview: Swansea City v Aston Villa

Who are we playing?
Swansea City

Where are we playing?
The small but beautifully formed Liberty Stadium, Swansea, 3pm Saturday.

Easy to get to?
Get off the M4 at Junction 45 and get on the A4067 South and you can't miss it. Good luck with parking though. It's a bit of a hike from the train station, but there's buses and taxis if you don't fancy the stroll. If your coach takes you straight there, you should be able to get a beer in the ground.

Can I go?
A combination of a reciprocal cheap ticket deal between the two clubs and the strength of our away following has ensured that we've sold out of our allocation, so if you've not got one, you can't go.

Can I watch it live on the telly?
Not legally in the UK no, however there are plenty of pubs with dodgy dishes and dubious web streams if you've not got a ticket but are desperate to watch as it happens.

Big game?
MASSIVE.

Swansea took a massive stride to safety by winning at Newcastle United, a feat a lot of struggling teams have managed. Sadly we didn't.

Villa's worrying lack of goal threat is not only making the fanbase miserable, it's also giving hope to the clubs below us that we can be overhauled. In this hugely unpredictable Premier League season, we simply can't rely on other teams failing, we MUST get some points of our own on the board.

Mind you, if Paul Lambert actually believes that our second half performance was "excellent", we really are fucked. He couldn't question the players' effort apparently. A large chunk of us do question it.

That duvet needs ironing

Shay and Sid haven't got a magic wand. If we can't play pretty then we have to grind out results. There are far too many players going through the motions at the moment.

"Not fit to wear the shirt" may be harsh but can you honestly remember a worse Villa team in your lifetime?

Do Swansea have any famous fans?
Struggling with this one a bit, but there is Darling Bud Catherine Zeta Jones, who is most famous for being Michael Douglas's carer wife.

Not a Swansea fan 

We've got Ritchie Neville from the boyband Five.

So we win.
Yes this is exactly the same as our famous fan section from the home game but cut us some slack. Swansea seem to be unloved by the glitterati.

Someone who definitely can't be counted as a celeb Swansea fan is ex-Coronation Street starlet Helen Flanagan. Airbrained Helen incurred the wrath of an entire nation when she tweeted “Started to get bored now, been in Wales too long, Lol. Must take action.” while boyfriend Scott Sinclair was stationed at the club

Who's playing for us?
Gabby and Andi Weimann looked woefully out of form against Southampton but will Lambert have the courage to drop two of his three favourite strikers when the other one is out injured? With Nicklas Helenius still doing a passable impression of the Invisible Man, it would seem that creaky old Grant Holt and enthusiastic young puppy Callum Robinson are the only options. Leandro Bacuna again proved that he is not a right back so we'd hope he'd be pushed into midfield to replace the mediocre El Ahmadi and Matt Lowton brought back but then we've been hoping for that for most of the season. We can only assume that our dour Scottish leader has got confused by his only real right back's squad number and assumed he was in the bomb squad. Albrighton was our only avenue of creativity last week so he'll probably drop him. Joe Bennett is a doubt for the match with a dodgy ankle but he probably wouldn't have started anyway.

Who's playing for them?
Angel Rangel has suddenly gone all Rory Delap with long throws. Daddy Cool Wilfried Bony is gonna terrify our back line.

Any useless stats?
Of course, here you go:

• Villa have only played twice before at the Liberty Stadium and have yet to win. Having said that we've yet to lose either

• We haven't won at Swansea since a 2-1 victory at the Vetch Field at Christmas 1971.  Villa legends Ray Graydon and Charlie Aitken got the goals.

• We have 15 wins over Swansea while they've beaten us 4 times and there have been 3 draws

• Our biggest win over the then Swansea Town was on Boxing Day 1936. Ronnie Dix got a hat trick as we thrashed the Swans 4-0.

He said, She said...
“It won’t be easy for us. No game is easy, especially at this time of the season. Like us, Aston Villa are scrapping to secure their safety. They are a young side and are very energetic. We are expecting a really tough game, and we can’t take anything for granted. If we go into these next three games and don’t get any other points while other teams win, we could be relegated. It’s far from over for us. We have to go into Saturday’s game to fight for three points. We have to make sure we are mathematically safe.” Garry Monk

"I’m totally relaxed about everything. I’m not uptight about anything. We’ve got to try and win football matches, which was always the case." Paul Lambert

Prediction
We just looked so not up for it against the Saints that it's hard to see things perking up dramatically in a week. The Welsh outfit will be on a high after Newcastle and in a game which we genuinely thought was our best chance of a win on the run-in, we're now predicting a Swansea victory.

Match Report: Aston Villa v Southampton as it was tweeted...

Randy Lerner Lives!!!!!!!!!!!!!

RANDY'S ALIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Missing in Action Aston Villa owner Randy Lerner is ALIVE, villamad.co.uk can report.

There have been no reported sightings of Villa's elusive chairman at Villa Park since 2012 and statements from the credit card magnate are as rare as hen's teeth.  However a story by Brian Doogan on the official Aston Villa site included a few short paragraphs which were seemingly penned by our illustrious benefactor:

"Our manager has been faced with some unexpected issues that could have very easily set the Club back.

"In watching him handle matters, along with our Chief Exec, I've seen total loyalty and commitment to Aston Villa while Gordon, a Villa man through and through, has repeatedly stepped up to support the Club regardless of the ask.

"Shay, too, has been unhesitating in answering the manager's call. I couldn't ask for more from people who are up for this challenge and the very real obstacles we have to overcome, as is everyone at the Club."

And that's all he wrote folks...

While some claim that Randy has had an extended absence from the club, Paul Lambert has hinted in the past that Randy has been in the ground in disguise and we at villamad.co.uk are suspicious that he may be lurking under Hercules's mask.

Next PR attempt? Is Hercules gonna take his head off and reveal he was Randy Lerner all the time, like the baddie in Scooby Doo? #avfc

— villamad.co.uk (@villamadtweets) April 14, 2014

.@villamadtweets "I'd have gotten away with it too if weren't for that pesky Holte End"

— villamad.co.uk (@villamadtweets) April 14, 2014

More info as we get it...

Lambert's most trusted allies turfed out.

Paul Faulkner

Just one day after Villa's Chief Executive Officer Paul Faulkner made a public statement calling for Villa's players, staff and supporters to pull together, the club have suspended Paul Lambert's most trusted lieutenants.

Out on his arse

First team coach Ian Culverhouse and head of football operations Gary
Karsa have both been removed from post pending an internal investigation at the club. No further details on the nature of that investigation have come from the club, but in the interim Villa legend Gordon Cowans and discarded goalkeeper Shay Given have been given battlefield promotions to assist the underfire Paul Lambert prepare for the vital home clash with Southampton.

The move seriously undermines Lambert's position at a time when he is facing increasing criticism from the club's most loyal support. Noises from the club suggest he backs the move, but the loss of two men who've been a key part of his team throughout his managerial career must a major personal blow.

In from the cold

Rumours that all is not right in the Villa camp have circulated for a while, with the most damning rumour being that Fabian Delph and Gabby Agbonlahor were fit to play in the home game against Fulham but were left out after backing Cowans in a row with Culverhouse. In the players' absence, Villa lost the six pointer when a win would have all but confirmed the club's Premier League status for next season.

Villa CEO Paul Faulkner's call for unity

“Four games ago, on the back of two good home wins, we were looking up the table and feeling confident of a strong, positive finish to the season.

“Since then we have suffered four consecutive defeats and that is hard to take. We are hurting. Fans are hurting, players and the manager are hurting. The frustration is shared by everyone who loves Aston Villa.

“Now more than ever it’s time for us all to pull together - fans, players, the manager, everyone at the Club. Our immediate focus and combined efforts need to be concentrated on our game against Southampton this weekend and on our remaining games this season. We need to channel our energies into creating a positive atmosphere and getting the result we need on Saturday at Villa Park and in the games that follow.

“Our fans have been magnificent throughout the season, as they always are. We are desperate to give them more to cheer about. I’m frustrated when we’re not able to do that and I know the manager and players are frustrated as well.

“We know we can handle adversity. What we need now is for everyone to stick behind the team and continue to show the great support that is a hallmark of our club.”

Paul Faulkner
Chief Executive Officer
Aston Villa Football Club

Match Preview: Aston Villa v Southampton

Who are we playing?
Southampton, a team we mugged three points off in the winter with the aid of a cracking Delph goal.

Where are we playing?
A jittery Villa Park, 3pm Saturday

Can I go?
Bags of tickets left, they may even do a few late price reductions if they are struggling to sell 'em. If you've not got a season ticket but sometimes go, they may ring you up.

Can I watch it live on the telly?
Not legally in the UK no, however there are plenty of pubs with dodgy dishes and dubious web streams if you've not got a ticket but are desperate to watch as it happens.

Relegation dog fight

Big game?
MASSIVE.

It's not unusual for a team to drop like a stone on the run in and find themselves in the relegation cross-hairs. This season that team is US.

In our favour is that Southampton are largely playing for pride now and top performers Lallana and Lambert will have one eye on the plane to Rio and will be wary of picking up an injury, something foremost in their minds after seeing what happened to Jay Rodriguez. However, the Saints, or certainly their fans, will want revenge for what happened at St Mary's, while their manager will be looking for a positive response after their shock home defeat to Cardiff.

That three points to the Welsh team, coupled with Fulham's resurgence under Felix Magath, leaves Villa in very real danger of dropping out of the the top flight unless we start picking up points.

Out on his arse

Lambert's waffle about how the game could have gone either way after the Palace debacle hardly instills confidence, and now Villa most loyal band of followers - the away support - has turned on the beleaguered manager with chants of "Fuck off Lambert" and "You don't know what you're doing" ringing out in a boisterous Selhurst Park last week.

Worrying rumours are also emerging about spats among the coaching staff with big name players involved. Hardly the atmosphere of unity required to see us through a very difficult looking few weeks.

The really frustrating thing about the Palace game was that we looked competitive in the final few minutes when we finally started to play with width.

Lambert is setting up to play with fear rather than the boldness that hallmarked bits of his first season. If we are gonna play like that, we may as well have kept McLeish.

However, Tuesday's events, with Culverhouse and Karsa suspended and Sid Cowans and Shay Given thrown in the coaching mix could make a massive difference.

the drummer out of Coldplay

Do Southampton have any famous fans?
Hardly any but there is the drummer out of Coldplay.

We've got a couple of Weasleys from Harry Potter

So we win.

Who's playing for us?
Barring any training ground spats that might see players missing with mysterious or fictitious ailments, Lambert (if he's still there) should pretty much have the same bunch to choose from as against Palace. Leandro Bacuna missed that trip with a hamstring strain (so we're told) and if that's right, he'll be touch and go to be fit for this one, though the manager said he'd be back in his presser.

Who's playing for them?
Our spy in the south reckons subs Nathaniel Clyne and Sam Gallagher livened the Saints up in the latter stages of the Cardiff clash so maybe one or both of them might force their way into the starting line-up.

Any useless stats?
Of course, here you go:

• We have 28 wins over Southampton to their 22 wins. There have been 20 draws.

• Our last Villa Park success against Southampton came back in August 2004. Darius Vassell and Carlton Cole were the scorers as we ran out 2-0 victors. Uriah Rennie was the ref.

• Southampton's last win at Villa was in January 2013, winning 1-0 nil thanks to a Rickie Lambert penalty won by Jay Rodriguez's cynical dive when Edna Stevens didn't even touch him. It was a tough defeat for Villa fans to take, hot on the heels of the cup exit to Bradford. Villa had ample chances to win the game but Benteke was firing blanks that day.

Diving git

• Villa's first encounter against Southampton was on 5th September 1936 at Villa Park. Dai Astley, Ronnie Dix, Gordon Hodgson and Frank Broome were the scorers as we won 4-0.

He said, She said...
“Against Aston Villa we will face a very tough team, a very physical side, a very difficult ground but our focus is to win.” Mauricio Pochettino

"I love it here. It’s a great club, great fanbase, I never came to Villa to be like this.The club is too big to be where it is. I recognised that when I came through the door on day one. This club should not have been where it has for the last four years." Paul Lambert

Prediction
Villa have had a habit of surprising the better teams and if we start well - a early goal could be crucial to keep the crowd on side - and then stick to the task, a Villa win isn't beyond the realms of possibility, so we are bravely predicting that (well @dekhogan is, blame him).

Match Report: Crystal Palace 1 Aston Villa 0 as it was tweeted...

Match Preview: Crystal Palace v Aston Villa

Gayle blows Villa's Christmas away

Who are we playing?
Crystal Palace, a team whose late winner at Villa Park wrecked our Christmas

Where are we playing?
The annoyingly located Selhurst Park at the unusual start time of 3.07pm on Saturday. This is part of a nationwide tribute to the victims of the Hillsborough tragedy, 25 years on.




Can I go?

Relegation dog fight

If you've not already snapped up your ticket, you can't. Sold Out.

Can I watch it live on the telly?
Not legally in the UK no, however there are plenty of pubs with dodgy dishes and dubious web streams if you've not got a ticket but are desperate to watch as it happens.

Big game?
MASSIVE.

Teams are trampling over each other in a bid to get away from the relegation trap door and Villa are getting stomped on in the stampede. Losing twice to the inept Fulham this season puts us right back in danger, a situation which could get worse if we lose to Palace in what is another genuine six pointer.

Nookie

Tony Pulis has made massive strides to turn the South London outfit from relegation certainties into an outfit capable of snatching the points off anyone on their day. The early season away form that has been the only saving grace in Villa's diabolical season is now a distant memory. We haven't managed an away win since New Years Day and that was against lowly struggling bottom of the pile Sunderland.

With Lambert's trump cards on the treatment/operating tables and the assembled squad he squandered Randy's money on exposed as being not good enough, the beleaguered Scot will need to pull a rabbit out of the hat here as calls for his head grow ever larger.

Palace fan Susanna Reid gets her leg over

Do Palace have any famous fans?
Quite a few as it goes. At least one Doctor Who and half of The Inbetweeners support the Eagles. There's also Modfather Paul Weller, Radio's Kid Jensen, Dancing Queen Suzanna off of breakfast telly and of course Nookie Bear.

We've got the Prime Minster (God help us).

Holt

So we win.

Who's playing for us?
Difficult to work out who Lambert is going to play when he's not being straight with the media. He managed to get through an entire press conference last week in which he spoke at length about Benteke without mentioning the minor fact that his Belgian talisman was seriously injured. This particularly angered the local press boys who were left scrabbling for info when the news broke on Twitter.

We'd imagine Grant Holt has done enough to keep his place in the starting line-up, unless of course he's been devoured by a pack of wild hyenas and it's slipped Lambert's mind to mention it. Joe Bennett being subbed off early might mean his place is in jeopardy. Meanwhile, whisper it, but Tonev might be in line for a recall having lowered his shooting sights.

Who's playing for them?
We'd like to see little Barry Bannan but he seems to have gone off radar lately. Puncheon can dangerous on his day, so we're hoping forlornly that our defence don't give him space.

Any useless stats?
Of course, here you go:

Savo

• We have 16 wins over Place to their 9 wins. There have been 13 draws.

• We've never won a Premier League match against Crystal Palace at Selhurst Park.

• Our last league win over Palace was at Villa Park in 1998. A goal from Ian Taylor and two from Savo Milošević gave us a 3-1 victory, Matt Jansen scoring for the Eagles. It was at this game that the infamous "Hercules the Lion sacked for mauling Miss Aston Villa" incident occurred.

• Our last victory over Palace at Selhurst Park came in September 1980 thanks to a solitary goal from Gary Shaw.

• Our last victory at Selhurst Park was against Wimbledon in 1997. Goals from little Alan Wright and Savo secured the 2-0 success.

He said, She said...
"We respect every club in this league, we'll do that with Aston Villa on Saturday" Tony Pulis

Prediction
A thumping Palace win, mild humiliation  and another annoying post-match presser from Lambo.

Match Report: Villa 1 Fulham 2 as it was tweeted...

Agent Kismet describes Benteke's Achilles rupture

Christian Benteke's agent, Eris Kismet has been describing the moment the striker ruptured his Achilles.

"He wanted to shoot and suddenly he heard a noise. He thought someone had tackled him from behind. Even people on the centre line heard the sound of the tendon rupture.

"He’s mentally strong. He knows he can’t turn back the clock,”

Benteke went down in training on Thursday, as the team prepared for the home Premier League match against Fulham on Saturday, and scans have revealed a rupture that will require surgery and an absence of at least six months.

Benteke has been a regular starter for Belgium, who face South Korea, Algeria and Russia in the group stage at the World Cup finals. The awful news is likely to mean greater involvement in Brazil for his Belgium team-mate Romelu Lukaku.

Benteke OUT at least six months, misses FIFA World Cup

Aston Villa's talismanic striker Christian Benteke will miss the World Cup with Belgium after tearing his Achilles tendon in training. He will be ruled out for at least six months according to the club but it's likely to be longer.

The 23-year-old, whose long-term future at Villa was said to be uncertain, had been expected to be part of Marc Wilmots's squad for the tournament in Brazil this summer and was an integral part of Paul Lambert's struggling Villa outfit.

"It’s a terrible blow both for Christian and for the club. He will miss the rest of the season and also the World Cup. But he’ll work hard because that’s what he does and he’ll come back for us stronger than ever next season" said Paul Lambert.